How do you tell the difference between a normal uncommunicative teen and one who’s in trouble and at risk for eating disorders, drug problems, violence, depression, suicide, and so on?
It may seem like an impossible task, but if you know your teen and are searching for problem signs, you probably already have an idea whether they’re in trouble or not. Trust your instincts and don’t assume that your teen simply couldn’t be affected by the problems that plague thousands of teenagers everyday with clueless parents.
Don’t compare your teen to others to see if their behavior is acceptable. Almost everyone knows a teen who has gotten into deep trouble, and sometimes it can be tempting to rationalize your teen’s behavior as okay, simply because it isn’t as bad as that other problem teen.
Be ready to face the truth if you choose to attempt to discover it. This means you have to keep an eye on your teen and be ready to intervene if you find out that something is wrong, and it is not an easy task.
What are some signs of unusually secretive teens who might be in trouble?
- They often lie or manipulate the truth about where they are, who they’re with, and what they’re doing.
- They steal money from you.
- Their attitude has recently changed drastically, for the worse.
- They keep secrets and become extremely angry when you try to find out what’s going on in their lives.
- Their schoolwork or participation activities becomes intermittent.
While many teens keep secrets, change in personality, or lie sometimes, being too secretive, stealing, and losing interest in all the activities they once enjoyed can signal worse things.
Be careful not to appear too pushy or domineering, as a teen who senses their parents are trying to control or change them can often become resentful and even more closed-off. Instead, try to maintain open and honest communication both ways.
Don’t lie to your teen or keep secrets if you don’t want them to do the same! Set a good example and make it clear that you’re always here to help them out — and then follow through with that promise by making yourself available to them, genuinely listening to their problems, and helping if they request it.
One common feature of teens in trouble is that they feel their parents just don’t care about them. A low sense of self-worth is fostered, and all the pressures of society towards teens today often just encourages them to feel this way. You can stop this problem before it begins by making it clear that you value and respect them, and helping out when you can.
Try to foster better communication with your teen, and remain patient. If he doesn’t respond well, there might be serious issues affecting him, so try to seek professional help if necessary.
While you’re concerned for your teen’s wellbeing as a parent, don’t let this paranoia consume you. Not all teens who are secretive or have some of these symptoms of being troubled actually are troubled.
Related posts:
- Teen Depression and Suicide
- How to Communicate With Your Teen
- Teen Sexuality: Your Little Kid All Grown Up?
- Talking to Your Teen About Drugs
- Your Teen and the Internet
Tags: Troubled Teens